There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
