Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
