Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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