That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
