Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
