While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
