i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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