HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
