dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
