She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
