discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
