I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
