Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize