he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
