Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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