So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
