Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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