Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
