Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
