I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Randomize
