I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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