Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
