Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
i out mim tonsoeep
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