I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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