your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
