I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
