i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Shame - the story of my life.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
