He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
