What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
