I wish I could punch you in the face.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
