you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize