Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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