just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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