Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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