I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
We talked him into tasing himself.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
