Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
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