escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
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