she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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