I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
I think your dad took our porno
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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