Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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