Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
