worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
