quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
