I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
