My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
