Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize