He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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