i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
