just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
