I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
